Curious, I went online to do some research (really, there's no need to thank me...) and here's what I learned.
First off, my research turned up a startling number of young parents who view thank-you notes as just a bunch of old-fashion nonsense. Who has time anymore to sit down and write a simple note that will probably come of as trite and meaningless? We hosted the party, so why should we waste time sending guests a "thank you" email for showing up with a gift? If we remember to utter a passing "thanks" in-person on our way to grab more paper plates for the gluten-free birthday cake, then that's more than enough.***
Really? Has saying "thanks" become that thankless of a job?
The "to thank or not to thank" debate has been raging on the down low on various mom blogs for a few years now. Yes, I know, but these online mothers are raising the next generation of working professionals, which may serve as a sign of things to come.
The excuses for not thanking party guests can be nothing short of amazing. My child can't write thank-you notes yet, which means that I would have to write them, and that wouldn't feel authentic. I don't like receiving thank-you cards/emails and I never open them, so why would I send them? If I, as the host, utter "thanks" to a guest in passing, then no follow-up should be required. Wait, thanking people is still a thing?
And my favorite: People who think they deserve a thank-you note are the rude ones. Glimpse the future, managers!
On the job front, the excuses keep right on coming. I can't send a thank-you note to the interviewer because I don't have his email address or correct name spelling. I'll send a thank-you card after an in-person interview, but never after an applicant-screening phone interview. It was only a first-stage interview, so I'm not wasting my time sending a thank-you email. I'm probably not getting the job, so why bother? I would have to buy stamps.
On the flip side is the question of how the professional thank-you card is being received. Note: most C-level professionals still like receiving one, and it leaves a largely positive impression of the sender.
I agree. A simple thank-you note -- whether written longhand or typed out online -- is one of the classiest of human gestures. Taking the time to say "thanks" shows that we're grateful, and that's such a beautiful thing to behold when you're on the receiving end of the message.
Thanks to technology, we have many options now for thanking our fellow professionals. There's email. The texted "thanks." The thank-you smartphone video sent by text (which seems to be a growing trend). The instant message thank-you message. The Facebook/Instagram thank-you. The Twitter thank-you (#thx). The phone call. The voice mail message. And of course, the traditional, hand-written thank-you card.
You'll have to decide which one works best, depending on the recipient and the situation. As long as you manage to say "thanks" for real, all is well.
In fact, the only time you might feel free not to say "thanks" is when you're absolutely, positively sure you do not want the job and would never, ever want to work for the company. It left that bad of an impression. Your silence, in return, will speak volumes.
In a professional situation, a quick thank-you card/email/text also helps the recipient connect our face to a name. It puts us on the other person's radar, because he or she might otherwise forget us soon enough -- or, egad, confuse us with somebody else. (It does happen.) A thank-you note is our last, best sales pitch for the job. Just don't overdo it. (Click here for tips on writing a good, professional thank-you card.)
Think of it this way: We're not thanking someone so much for the past as we're laying the foundation for our relationship with this individual going forward, because everyone remembers when they were not thanked.
Taking the time to thank people properly will never go out of style, whether we're thanking a gift-giving parent, a kind co-worker, a birthday-remembering boss, or the intrepid interviewer who spent 30 minutes on the phone with us earlier today. Email it, text it, snail mail it -- whatever works best for us, and the recipient. Anything less is, well, it's just lazy.
PS: Thanks for taking the time to read this blog post.
*** No, it's not. It's best to send a follow-up thank you note (in any form!) now that children's birthday gifts tend to be opened AFTER the party guests have gone. With a thank-you note, you're letting the gift giver know that you got the gift because, for all we know, it could be sitting lost and forgotten in the trunk of your car, smashed underneath random soccer gear and a stack of reusable grocery bags. A thank-you note closes the gift-giving loop, and puts the gift giver's mind at ease.
This is dummy text. It is not meant to be read. Accordingly, it is difficult to figure out when to end it. But then, this is dummy text. It is not meant to be read. Period.
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